When you start a business, and perhaps even if you’ve been running a business for a while, it can be really easy to find yourself caught up in comparison with another business owner or another coach.
With social media we get to see everyone else’s highlight reel which can be triggering and leave you feeling like you aren’t enough.
Perhaps it feels like ‘why would anyone want to work with me’ when this other person exists. It can trigger feelings of imposter syndrome, feelings of not being good enough and it can really make you spiral into not such a great place.
So how can we manage comparison as a coach and business owner?
Here’s a few tips to help you beat comparison…
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ASK YOURSELF WHAT THE COMPARISON IS TRYING TO TELL YOU.
Before you start implementing any of the other tips, spend a little bit of time asking yourself what the comparison is trying to tell you about how you’re feeling, what might be missing from your life and business, and what it is you really want.
Sometimes comparison is simply because we’re spending too much time online and seeing all of these highlight reels but occasionally the comparison is trying to tell us that something is missing and that can be really valuable information when it comes to deciding on your own goals.
This is especially true if the comparison has a bit of a jealous edge to it – I know it’s not nice admitting that to yourself! But when I feel jealous it’s often because someone has something I want in my own life and just becoming aware of that can be helpful when it comes to understanding what direction I want to go in.
MUTE OR UNFOLLOW THE PEOPLE WHO ARE TRIGGERING YOUR COMPARISON.
I know this can be difficult to do and can leave you feeling like a bit of a bitch, but if following certain people is making you feel like shit it’s time to reclaim your energy so you can focus it into your own work, into your own journey and into achieving your own version of success.
So don’t be afraid to unfollow or mute (even temporarily) the accounts of people who trigger your comparison so you’re able to stay in your own lane and move on with your work.
GET CLEAR ON YOUR OWN VERSION OF SUCCESS.
This is something I go on and on about but it’s so helpful to have a clear vision for what your version of success looks like.
What I often find in my own journey is that when I’m comparing myself to someone else it’s because they are experiencing something that is seen as successful by wider society but isn’t actually part of my own version of success. Knowing and focusing on what is successful to me really helps me not get bogged down in what other people are doing and helps me focus on my own journey to getting what I want.
REMEMBER THAT NO ONE CAN TAKE YOUR CROWN
One of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever heard when it comes to comparison (h/t Sarah Jenks) is to imagine a throne that only belongs to you. That throne is yours no one else can take that throne and wear your crown because it belongs to you.
No matter what anyone else does they will never ever be able to take your crown or sit in your throne because it belongs to you and they have their own crown and throne for themselves which no one else can take either.
This is such a helpful thing to visualise and consider on a spiritual level because no one can take away what is meant for you. Often comparison is triggered by this feeling of not enoughness or of competition and remembering that no one can take away anything that is meant for you can be a useful mindset flip to help you manage feelings of comparison.
DOUBLE DOWN ON WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT MAKES YOU YOU
When comparison is triggered by feelings of not being enough or worrying that no one will want to work with you over the other person it can be really helpful to focus on what makes you, you.
You are unique, there is no one else like you on this planet, no one else with the same experiences, the same perspective on things or the same voice. Consider how you can utilise more of your uniqueness in what you do.
Grow your confidence
In my own life, I’ve noticed that my feelings of comparison have dramatically lessened as my confidence in myself and my business has grown. The more confident I’ve become in who I am and what my business does to help people, the less comparison has affected me.
A good place to start when it comes to growing your confidence around your business is collecting positive client feedback about your work. Start keeping a positive feedback folder in your inbox, it can be really encouraging to look through when you need a confidence boost!
If you’re still at the stage where you haven’t had a lot of clients yet, then I can help! Check out my free Aligned Client Attraction and Marketing Workshop below for a simple step by step strategy for getting more clients and marketing your services in a way that’s aligned for you:
For me, my comparison often gets worse when I’m consuming too much of other people’s stuff and the world is getting a bit noisy. Sometimes I just need to turn the volume down so I can hear my own voice clearly again. That’s why muting some people who do similar work to you can be useful so you can hear your own voice again and find that clarity without your energy being so scattered.
I’d love to know if these tips have been helpful, have you ever experienced professional comparison as a coach? Let me know in the comments!
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