This is a long post so grab a cuppa and get comfy!
Well it’s been a while since I’ve done one of these! Of course a lot has changed for me recently, part of me never believed I would never be writing the words ‘I’m pregnant’ after the health issues I’ve been dealing with. I’ve looked back at my post at the start of the year before I knew I was pregnant, even then I said I had a feeling this year was going to be a good one. I do mention how happy we were and that we didn’t feel like we had a hole in our lives that needed a child to fill it. I still stand by that statement, getting pregnant is the best thing that has ever happened to me, but I’m glad it came to me while in a place of contentment and not sadness or desperation if that makes sense.
You can catch up with my other more personal posts here, but to do a quick rewind, 4 and a half years ago I was 15st, my heaviest ever and not very happy in my own skin. I lost weight through generally healthy eating and exercise but then took things a little too far and lost more weight until I was under 9st. I was still a healthy BMI, but I didn’t look great and when I came off the pill my period never returned. That was almost 3 years ago. Bring on weight gain and exercise reduction, then finally medication to get me ovulating. As it happens one ovulation was enough :-)
I have to admit, before I found out I was pregnant I was feeling fed up. I’d gained a lot of weight and nothing seemed to be getting any better or so it seemed. I never want to be under 9 st again, but I was feeling like I’d be more comfortable a little smaller and since the weight gain hadn’t seemed to have made any difference I was at the end of my tether and dialling it up to get back to a place where I felt more confident and healthy.
Then of course I got pregnant and everything changed. And by God all of that weight gain and anguish that came with it over the last couple of years has been worth it!
For a few weeks I was having a hard time with pregnancy comparison. I’m just not going to be one of these slim women with a perfect beach ball bump. What I’ve realised is that every woman is different and the women who are pregnant in the blogging world aren’t necessarily an accurate representation of most pregnant women out there! My focus now is on looking after my body and my baby, and that in itself has had a big positive impact on my relationship with food. The first trimester was tricky, as after feeling sick I would then feel ravenous and because all I could stomach was carbs I was worried I was going to gain too much weight. As it happens I’m actually pretty much spot on in terms of the weight I’ve gained so far which I’m happy about.
Now that my food aversions have mostly gone, I’m just going with the flow and loving it! I do make a conscious effort to eat nutrient dense foods, but that is generally what I’m craving anyway. I’m also allowing myself treats, but trying not to let the fact that I’m pregnant become an excuse to have too many, which can be a danger with me ;-) So when it comes to food I’m in a really relaxed place where mindfulness and management meet – more on this in a future post!
Exercise has taken a back seat and after stressing about that a bit, again I’m just happy to go with the flow now. As long as I am active, including walking, I feel happy I’m doing best for my body and the baby. I do have the odd fat and frumpy days, but as I’ve mentioned in my pregnancy updates I think it’s just that phase of pregnancy where you don’t really look that pregnant and rather look like you’ve attacked a buffet table. So overall I’m trying to focus on enjoying the pregnancy and being pregnant but part of me just can’t wait to meet this baby and start a big new chapter in my life. I’d also be lying if I said I wasn’t looking forward to getting back into shape, I have an unofficial target of feeling my absolute best by my 33rd birthday in August 2015 which gives me plenty of time after the baby’s born to do things sensibly and sustainably.
In other areas of my life things are going mostly really well. I’m not going to give you loads of happy happy bullshit crap, but I really have nothing to complain about either. Our flat is on the market and as much as I hope it will sell, I’m trying not to become too focused on that outcome. Instead I’m just putting my intention out there, doing what I can and then getting on with it. Bringing up a baby in a one bed flat for a few months isn’t the end of the world, blimey at least we have a roof over our heads! In fact I think it would be rather an adventure. Now how’s that for a reframe ;-)
My business is just bloody awesome and I have some big plans to get going with, including my first recipe e book, a total over haul of Uniquely Healthy and more community projects. There’s also been some very exciting developments recently which look like they could turn out to be a great area of work for me. I am still enjoying my community work more than I could have imagined, I think it’s important to be doing something in the ‘real world’ and not disappear into an online bubble. To start with I was quite nervous about it, but I just love it and get so much satisfaction from making even a small difference in the lives of people that need it. I also have some truly amazing health coaching clients, and the guys doing the 12 weeks to Feeling Fab course are just awesome too, I’m very lucky to know them all. I just love what I do!