First of all I just have to say a huge thank you for all the comments, tweets, Facebook messages and emails I am absolutely blown away!
I’m sure you all know the facts of life ;-) but if you’ve been reading KHGS for a while you’ll know that me being pregnant would have came as rather a shock due to the issues I’ve been facing over the last two and a half years. To catch you up, after losing a lot of weight and then losing even more, I came off the pill and never got a period. We weren’t trying for a family back then, I just decided that I no longer wanted to be putting hormones into my body like that. As it happens that mix of stress on my body from being such a low weight (for me), over exercising and hormone suppressing effects of the pill meant that for the last two and a half years I’ve had no periods, haven’t ovulated and essentially, have been infertile.
I recognised that what I could be dealing with was Hypothalamic Amenorrhea (HA) so started to gain weight and reduce my exercise. I’ve gained well over 2 stone back and right now I’m almost exactly at the point between my lowest and highest weights. Gaining weight has not been easy at all, but I knew that this was an issue that needed to be sorted out, we would want to have children one day, but more importantly, I wanted to have a healthy body functioning as a woman’s should. That was more important to me than being slim. I tried weight gain, seed cycling and acupuncture with only marginal improvements and after two years I decided to go down a medical route. For the last 9 months I’ve been seeing a consultant at the hospital and have been for various tests. When every test had been done and other options exhausted, I made the decision to try medication that would make me ovulate.
At first it didn’t work and I had really started to face up to the idea that children might just not be on the cards for me. If you asked me what my biggest fear was a few years ago, infertility would have been top of the list, but it was something I had to possibly come to terms with. James and I discussed it and as much as we knew we would like children some day, we also believed that a life without children could be just as awesome. We are lucky to have some amazing role models like my aunt and uncle who don’t have kids but have a tremendously full life. When the medication eventually worked enough to give me my first period in over two years – I was over the moon, but my blood tests showed that I still hadn’t ovulated so I was only half way there. The next attempt didn’t work at all, and then at the start of the year I tried another round of the medication. Some of you will remember that I posted how happy I was that I had ovulated. I would have never dreamed that one ovulation would have been enough to get me pregnant!
After I had that positive ovulation blood test I was quietly awaiting a period. At the time I was experiencing cramps, extreme tiredness and sore swollen breasts so I just thought it was my period on it’s way. But in the back of my mind a little voice was telling me I could be pregnant. I ignored it until the day I should have started my period had past, and decided I might as well take a pregnancy test. I didn’t even tell James I was doing it, I just headed straight to the bathroom when I woke up one Wednesday morning and there it was, 2 little lines that would change my life forever. I could hardly believe it, how the hell could I get pregnant so quickly! I took another test to be sure as well.
I also went to the doctors and had another test done. I just couldn’t believe it. Although it was early days (I was guessing I was just over 4 weeks pregnant) we told my parents, James family and my best friends and for the last 3 weeks I’ve been on tender hooks just hoping that everything would be alright. As I’d been under the care of the consultant, it was arranged for me to have an early scan to check all was well. I was a nervous wreck before hand, for a baby I never realised I wanted right now, the idea of something going wrong was horrendous. But I needn’t have worried:
Straight away we saw our little peanut with her flickering heart. I cried my eyes out with relief. The scan put me at 8 weeks 3 days so a good week ahead of where I thought I was (I must have ovulated very early in January) and when you see a heart beat after 8 weeks the chance of something going wrong drops down to under 5% thankfully.
I wanted to spill the beans on the blog for a few reasons – firstly I thought it might start to become obvious something was up, my exercise has changed quite a lot because I’ve been too exhausted to do what I would usually be doing, early morning workouts are not happening and I’ve literally eaten no big green salads because that is definitely one food aversion I’ve been experiencing (along with coffee and plain chicken and fish, urgh!) I also felt uncomfortable with the idea of lying about things – which I would have had to do not to make the situation obvious. When it comes to my eats, as I said big salads have been out and all I’ve wanted to eat are ALL THE CARBS – crisps, cheese on toast, cereal and chocolate. I have managed to get in some balanced days and used them for WIAW, but they are becoming few and far between as feelings of nausea come and go. Plus it just didn’t feel right not sharing this with you guys!
When it comes to the M word, I am a lot happier that I am over 8 weeks and have seen the heart beat but I know that things can go wrong at any point in pregnancy. God forbid it does, but if anything happened I would share it here, I think I’ve been open and honest enough in the 4 years I’ve been blogging so why stop now. Oh and of course, James has been desperate to shout the news from the roof tops too!
Right now I’m 9 weeks and counting to the end of the first trimester. I’m still in shock to be honest, I know it might sound naive but I did not imagine that I would fall pregnant in just one ovulation, or we might have been a bit more careful! I am in awe at my body though, to fall pregnant and stay pregnant so quickly is amazing. I have been wondering why the medication worked that time round, perhaps because it had built up over time, or maybe because I had gained even more weight over Christmas. Either way I’m not complaining!
I tend to think it has been the result of a cumulative effect of weight gain, stress management, good nutrition and the medication that has done the trick. The medication might have helped me ovulate, but I’ve no doubt my healthy lifestyle has helped me get pregnant – and I guess James swimmers might have had something to do with that too ;-)
Naturally I will be posting about the pregnancy on KHGS to share my experiences and record my journey for my own benefit. However I know that it can get rather boring if you have no interest in pregnancy right now. I’m thinking I might try and keep pregnancy stuff to one post a week on a Friday, then if you aren’t interested in it you can skip it.
At the start of 2014 I had a feeling this was going to be a good year, I couldn’t have imagined it would be good in this way though! I can honestly say I’ve never been happier in my life, I can’t wait to meet this little miracle. Gaining weight, having more ‘fat’ days recently and even questioning my abilities as a healthy living blogger / coach has all been worth it for this.
Any pregnant ladies or mums out there have tips on dealing with early pregnancy anxiety?
OMGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!! what amazing news lovely I am soooooooo happy for you and James! honestly i couldn’t think of a more deserving couple and you are a true testament to someone that listened to their body and overcame their obstacles! you are my inspiration! congrats again hope to see you soon xxxx
Thanks Chrissy! Hope to see you again soon too!
Wow! What a great story! I’m so glad everything is ticking along well, and at least you’re not off smoothies! I’m looking forward to all the recaps, I lie seeing how different women manage pregnancy! Congratulations again!
Haha I would be gutted if I was off smoothies ;-)
I don’t usually post on blogs (I’m a lurker!) but I just wanted to say congratulations!!!! You really deserve all the happiness in the world, and we’ll all be wishing you well <3
Thanks so much Snenny!
CONGRATS!!!! Again I am so happy for you two and can’t wait for the updates x x
Congratulations, Laura! What amazing news. I can’t wait to read about the journey on your blog :)
Congratulations! I have followed your wonderful blog for several years now with interest and I was wishing this news would appear. This time last year I was pregnant with my first baby and we welcomed Isaac in to the world in October! It’s the most amazing time of my life, I loved every minute of being pregnant even the labour and birth I found enjoyable! Our body’s are amazing how they know what to do. Advice on dealing with anxiety I would say relax, listen to your body (which you do so well already), but also continue being as active as possible. The anxiety doesn’t disappear when you reach the milestones it just changes. Don’t worry about the diet I was the same I went off my juices and smoothies and became obsessed with cereal and tinned peaches until about 14 weeks when my energy returned along with my old diet of green smoothies, salads and fruit.
One thing I can recommend to help with late pregnancy anxiety is hypnobirthing. I was very nervous about labour and would get a panic attack watching one born every minute as I was convinced I wouldn’t cope however I found a wonderful hypnobirthing tutor and we did classes, I taught myself to go in to deep relaxation and my labour was wonderful, relaxed and medication free.
Congratulations this is a wonderful time for you and your family.
Congrats on having baby Isaac! I hope I find labour and birth enjoyable too – I will definitely check out hypnobirthing. I’m hoping that my food aversions, tiredness and nausea will go at the end of the first trimester too, fingers crossed!
So happy for you! And boy, do I hear ya on the carb cravings! I’m 21 weeks now, and have been learning how to deal with a range of anxieties and other feelings. I think the best thing is to breathe deep and trust in your body. Yoga has been really helpful :)
I’ve re joined yogaglo and they have some good pre natal classes thankfully. I’m definitely trying to trust my body more, I’ve been reading a great book and one of the things the author said was to learn to trust your body so I’m really working hard on that :-) Did you find out the sex of your baby yet? I can remember seeing on Facebook you had had a scan but the baby was being shy x
Not yet – we go today! Really hoping baby cooperates today :-) will let you know! Ooh, I also started an aqua natal class – if you can find one in your area I highly recommend it! Was good to do cardio like that and not feel the effects of gravity :)
You little carby wonder, you! I couldn’t be happier for you if I tried and (despite not being the most baby-orientated person) I cannot wait to read your updates.
Congratulations Laura! I’ve followed your blog for years… I read your blog every day and I love to hear what’s happening in the World of KHGS and have felt your ups and downs – and today I share your delight! Nice One!
Congratulations Laura and James! What a massive, brilliant surprise for you both!
I know you tried all the alternative routes but I’m a firm believer that sometimes medicine really is the best medicine.
Once again, I’m so very pleased for you both – what an incredible time, and the very fact that you’ve fallen pregnant at all is testament to your healthy ethos and the work you’ve done listening to your body. Also thank you for sharing such a personal story on here – it only serves to make you all the more inspiring! I can’t wait to read your Friday updates – if only to prepare myself for the future (hopefully!). I’m sure you and James will make wonderful parents to baby KHGS. :) xx
Thanks Pop :-) Hope you enjoy my future updates!
Wow what a story! It’s amazing how some women are so in tune with their bodies that they just ‘know’ so quickly too..I always find it’s the ones who have had food issues etc, quite interesting :) But yeah, looking back at your workouts etc it all makes sense now hehe! Whilst I’m not pregnant and haven’t been (obviously!) and am not planning it anywhere near in the future I always find it interesting to hear experiences because I find the body so fascinating so I look forward to hearing your journey :)
‘Gaining weight, having more ‘fat’ days recently and even questioning my abilities as a healthy living blogger / coach has all been worth it for this.’ – this made me smile :) :) You certainly are an inspiration to many women, I can assure you :)
Thanks so much for this Nicky – I think you are right about women who have had food issues being a bit more in tune on things like that! You are so lovely, I really do hope I have inspired a few people along the way!
Congratulations!!! Such fabulous news :-) It sounds like you have completely the right attitude to your pregnancy. My little girl is just over a year old and it’s been the best/craziest/loveliest year of my life! We had a few scares in the first trimester which made me a bit anxious but once we got into the second trimester I really started to relax and just enjoy the pregnancy – so my advice is to do things that help you relax and feel good but don’t beat yourself up if you get anxious sometimes because it’s a completely natural reaction to a life changing event like pregnancy! And find a lead maternity carer you trust – even when we found out the baby was breech and I would need a c-section I felt pretty relaxe about it because I trusted my OB completely. Take care and enjoy! Such an exciting time xx
Thanks for the advice Bron and congrats on having your little girl! The anxiety thing has improved a lot since my scan. I’ve had absolutely no reason to worry so far, from what I’ve read it’s all been very ‘normal’ I think part of it is my tendency to worry, but a friend said to me that from now on you will always worry about them, which of cause is true, I just needed to find a way of dealing with the anxiety better :-)
Lauraaaa! This is too amazing. I actually yelped when I saw the pic on yesterday’s post! From following the story of your journey I can only imagine how exciting this must be for you and James. I’ll definitely be reading every Fri!
It’s also given me real hope – I’m still battling with post-pill-period-problems (lol), and although I’m not looking to start a family asap, I do want to try everything I can to get to the bottom of it. Your determination is a real motivation – and just look at that blurry little reward! Eeee! Massive congrats xxx
Thanks Cat, best of luck with your post pill issues, it’s definitely something to get sorted, good for you for being determined on that!
Laura once again I am just so so happy for you both!!!!!!!!!!!
I think it’s really fabulous that you treated your body scientifically and created something from that. Words mean nothing to me without results. And here I see results. Bravo.
Thanks Nicole, yep definitely can’t argue with the results here! ;-)
I can feel your joy in your words..and I am so happy for you! My brother and his wife struggled for a few years..they tried many different medicinal routes..and then my sister-in-law went for some treatment overseas (India I think), and praise the Lord she now has a beautiful baby boy :).
Even though I’m not interested in pregnancy, I am interested in following up on your journey..so do keep us posted :)
Congrats to your brother and wife! I’m so glad they were able to be successful :-)
I had thought something might be up from your weekly workouts – I’d just assumed you were exhausted or the drugs you were on for ovulation had some nasty side-effects which meant you weren’t feeling well enough to exercise!
In terms of the m word, I think the best thing you could probably do would be try not to get too stressed and anxious about it if at all possible – low levels of stress have a positive impact on so many physical processes, so keep taking care of yourself and honestly it doesn’t matter if you’re not eating greens all day long! From all the pregnant bloggers I’ve followed over the years (all of them uber-fixated on healthy food beforehand), it doesn’t seem as though anyone exactly feels like eating masses of vegetables in the first trimester: it’s completely normal.
Oh the workouts, blimey I wish I could be one of these pregnant women working out all the time but I seriously have no idea how they do it, I’m shattered all the time!
My anxiety has gone down a lot since the scan, I honestly thought they would scan me and find nothing. I’ve calmed down a lot now and feel like I can start trusting my body more. Glad that even the cra-cra healthy bloggers go off veggies ;-) Although ketchup has been helping me with that recently!
Fantastic to read this today Laura, and this is so amazing that it has happened so quickly & after all the hard work you’ve done in really tuning yourself with your body. A great lesson for all women!
Laura, your blog post actually brought tears to my eyes – I can feel your joy across the distance! Congratulations again and may you have a wonderfully smooth pregnancy!
Congratulations!!!! I had a difficult path becoming pregnant too but being a mum is the BEST thing that ever happened to me :) Oh, and you never stop worrying… welcome to motherhood! xxx
Haha – that is just what my friend said, you will always worry, so find a way to deal with it!
Awwww! I am so SO chuffed for you. My brother and his wife had to go down the IVF route and were so lucky that it worked first time. I’m going to be trying to get pregnant later this year and so to hear such incredible stories like these, it makes me feel so good.
Really looking forward to hearing more and all the updates. xxxx
Thanks Cat, congrats to your brother and best of luck for you later this year!
First-time anxieties are common in many expectant mummys! I found meditation, asanas & repeating ‘happy, healthy baby’ like a mantra useful(my baby’s now 23m:-)!
Yes, the human body is amazing(pregnancy is short so cherish this time with your beloved ‘peanut’ ,Laura;-)!
Congratulattions to you both once again(not at all surprised that your hubz is overjoyed, he’s very fortunate indeed;-)!
Funnily enough that is exactly what I’ve been doing – whenever I get a ‘worst case scenario’ flash I repeat healthy, happy, strong pregnancy, healthy, happy, strong baby – it definitely helps!
Laura, I didn’t see your previous post yet so: Congratulations! It’s amazing news and even more so knowing your journey and all you’ve been going through. This is proof of how well you’ve taken care of yourself, listening to your inner voice and doing what’s right for you. I hope you’ll have a great pregnancy.
Congratulations again Laura, wishing you all the best for a happy and healthy pregnancy!
I am so happy for you Laura! Congratulations.
Ahh how exciting!!
It’s just lovely that it’s happened for you both :) I can’t wait to hear more on the blog about it. I love that you’re craving carbs hehe. Ben always jokes that when I get pregnant (not for a while yet!) that I’ll probably crave fast food and rubbish and can’t eat apples. I think he’s secretly hoping for that to happen haha.
Haha, I’m actually craving apples more! I ate two yesterday and would have had more if they’d been in the fridge!
That is amazing news!!! I myself went through similar issues (lost a lot of weight, went off the pill…no period…nothing.) We tried for 3 years then had some help from specialists and I just had my son in January. I remember being shocked as well when I took the test right off the bat and we were pregnant! It’s very exciting stuff, and I wish you nothing but the best!
Oh congrats Katie that is wonderful! xxx
AGAIN … so over the moon for you :-)
I cannot wait to read about your experiences and be warned – EVERYONE has a story (yip including me ;-)) and people WILL come and rub your belly …. I liked it but not many people do.
Haha I’ve been discovering a few of those stories so far haha! Will be interested to see how I manage the belly rubbing!
I am so so happy for you guys. I’ve followed your journey for a long time, and I knew things would all work out for you in the end, can’t wait to follow you on this new journey. This is such awesome news. Congrats!!
I could not be happier for you Laura, seriously…nobody deserves it more xx
I am so, so happy for you!!! And I know another blogger who went through something similar and got pregnant before ever getting a period too – I guess it just happens sometimes! I can’t wait to follow you through your pregnancy, thanks for sharing with all of us on here!
Thanks Katie! It’s so lovely that other bloggers have had the same experience, hopefully it will give any readers out there hope if they are dealing with the same thing :-)
Congratulations again! I don’t think anyone would have thought you were “lying” by not telling people until later- normally people do wait 3 months, but I can see why you would want to share it. I actually thought you were hinting about it at Christmas when you mentioned about 2014 being a great year- obviously you didn’t even realise at that point!
Hope everything continues to go well for you. x
I think people usually wait till after 3 months as the risk of miscarriage drops plus most people don’t have the scan until 12 weeks – there’s no way I would have announced it before a scan – I needed to know there was something in there! ;-) With the lying I more meant having to edit what I was showing for WIAW etc – because some of the eat’s I’ve been having like 10 corn cakes covered in butter might have been a bit suspect haha!
Having followed your journey over the past couple of years, I honestly can’t even express how happy I am for you, Laura. You’re SUCH an inspiration when it comes to being healthy and doing what’s right for your body, and it’s great to see that all your efforts have paid off. I’m definitely looking forward to following you in this new chapter of your life, and I know you’re going to make a great mother :)
Thank you so much Amanda, that is lovely of you to say – I really hope that I do inspire some people, especially around the healthy weight thing :-)
Wow – fantastic news Laura. Wishing you all the best for your pregnancy and everything that lies ahead!
So excited for you!!
I definitely shed a tear reading this post. Laura, I’m so, so happy you and James are expecting a little one. It truly has made my week and I can’t wait to read as your progress through your pregnancy xxxx
Warm congratulations to you, Laura! I am thrilled for both you and James, and look forward to hearing your stories as you experience the wondrous stages of pregnancy. Best wishes-
Hi Laura – I’m thrilled for you! Your story gives me so much hope. In 2011 I lost 4 stone and went vegan to try and get healthy so we could try for a baby. When I came off the pill last May…no periods. Nothing. I was diagnosed with PCOS. I’ve gained about 2 stone back and reintroduced some animal protein to my diet which resulted in a period in December, and a very light one in early Feb but no ovulation. still no pregnancy but you’ve given me hope that it can be done. I’m seeing the doctor in May for a referral to the delightfully named infertility clinic which hopefully will result in a prescription to kick start ovulation. You are officially my inspiration! X
Another lurker here but wanted to say huge congrats! xxxxxxx
I’m so happy for you guys, and can’t wait to see your little bump in a couple of months!
Congratulations! I can relate to the struggle. Though it hasn’t been long it is very frustrating! I just started reading your website after my sister referred me to it (we had similar posts on coconut oil). I have never had regular periods…ever. We are hoping to get pregnant soon but I still have not had a cycle since going off BC in July. Granted I was training for a marathon and very lean until November. I am impatient and want this to happen asap, I’m 28 but still I’m putting my spring and summer running aside which is tough when that a huge part of your routine. I really hope supplements and a few lbs will do the trick. It is definitely a mystery to me. I have a gf will similar issues and we are both in the medical field. The body just likes to keep us guessing. I can’t wait to follow your journey on the blog : ) I am working on creating my own healthy lifestyle blog slowly and would love input.
Hi Amanda, thanks for the comment! I really hope you have some luck, if you ever want to talk about it more please feel free to email. Oh and would love to find out more about your healthy living blog!